How to get through loneliness during solo travel

Solo travel is the most beautiful experience you can give yourself… it rips open your soul and gives the gift of realizing things about yourself you never knew before, finding a deeper strength within yourself, gaining a new clarity,  as well gives you a brand new perspective on the world and how people live.

I would highly recommend solo travel to everyone and it will always be a part of my life. The downside though? It can get lonely. Like really lonely. It’s a rollercoaster because some days you feel on top of the world and you couldn’t feel more grateful and in love with the place. Then sometimes it hits you and to be completely honest, I am having one of those days today as I write this. It was my inspiration for writing this post actually.

I have been in Israel for a week and I have struggled to meet like minded people and make friends. I have encountered numerous men trying to take me out, hang out with me, but I have no interest in dating or even drinking or partying. I honestly just want to meet like minded people and share meals together and possibly form bonds. Today though I woke up frustrated, I woke up angry, and I woke up feeling annoyed. Last time I was here I was dating someone here and he was constantly taking me to new places, hanging with me, and I could turn to him for guidance. The whole point of me being here is because I came back to be with him as well as spend a longer time here. Well….not too long  before my trip, he told me he met someone and that it’s serious… I know (rolls eyes).. anyways I still decided to come to Israel again and make this a trip all about me, a kind of soul upgrade.

This past week I have actually loved being by myself and having the alone time, I haven’t felt the need to really be with anyone. Then last night I felt it… I was walking home and as I passed every restaurant I noticed not one person was alone, that everyone was in groups, couples, families. The loneliness took over me. Certain places you travel there is a lot of people alone like in Bali but in Tel Aviv I rarely see anyone alone. I started to feel anxiety over being the only person sitting alone and also sadness having to have people all around me surrounded by loved ones. So I went home and went to sleep because I felt hungry and exhausted. I was hoping I would wake up and feel better.

So to revert back to what I was saying I did not wake up better, as I stated above it was quite the opposite. I knew my emotions were out of alignment and that if I stayed in this mindset I would start to replay old negative habits and go down a rabbit hole of being in a low vibration. So I knew I had to snap myself out of this so here is what helped me and I send you so much love and hope it helps you as well.

• Feel – Sit back and feel those emotions ( good and bad) creep up all over you. Lean into it. What I mean by that is its uncomfortable and the more you just avoid resisting the more you can lean into it. I felt angry, frustrated, sad, and annoyed at everyone and everything. I started to put the blame on others (in my head) and I started to get into the mindset of maybe I should say fuck it and just go get drunk and numb these feelings away. Yep thats the low vibration I was in.  So I let all these negative emotions really take over me.
• Shift – I paused and realized that going and getting drunk and numbing myself just to fit in and not feel these lonely feelings is only going to later lead me to feeling shitty and lead me to go down an even lower vibrational rabbit hole. So I decided then and there I was ready to shift this way of thinking.
• Write – I brought my journal and my book to a restaurant I liked and ordered a matcha latte and pomegranate buckwheat pancakes ( bring on the CARBS!) and I just went on a rampage. I let myself free write whatever was on my mind. All the anger I was feeling and where it was coming from, frustrations I was feeling with certain people in my life, with Israel, with the people I was meeting, the challenges I was facing and that I was feeling tempted to numb myself. I didn’t think I just wrote.
• Gratitude – Yep it sounds so cheesy I know, but I wrote out a Gratitude list and I wrote a few things I was grateful for ;for  traveling, for working out that morning, for being strong enough to solo travel, for continuing to try, I also wrote that I was grateful for feeling all of the above because I knew it was leading me to go more internal.
• Do something that helps you shift your mindset – whether it’s going for a walk, calling a friend, listening to a meditation or podcast, or even reading a book. In my case it was pulling out the current book I’m reading and reading a chapter which as the universe would have it was about releasing control and surrendering. Which leads me to the next step.
• Surrender – Read this prayer

Thank you universe and guide of the highest truth and compassion. I am ready to feel free. I welcome a newfound faith. I surrender. – Gabby Bernstein

I sat there and surrendered. I let it go and I repeated that prayer a couple times and decided I’m going to use this fuel and write this post. I have actually been wanting to blog for a week and I have felt nothing but resistance and lack of motivation and because of that entire morning of feeling lonely I was able to find the drive and motivation and I walked to this beautiful rooftop at this hostel and just wrote out this blog post. I am in alignment with myself. I have decided to be patient for maybe the universe is bringing like minded people to me but I had to realign with myself first. and I have surrendered.

I hope this post helps you and feel free to reach out to me if your having a lonely day because I can totally relate and am here for you too!